My Preschooler, P, is adjusting pretty well to being a big sister (please feel free to visit our previous documentary on life as a The Jungle Cub). On most days, I can count on her to be a typical almost-three-year-old. Other days, like the one described below, I am ready to submit my resignation letter to Daddy Dearest.
Enjoy as P details quite possibly the most challenging day yet...
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| The Girls |
"I just started school and I love it! My teacher and my friends are awesome. Of course, when Mother arrives, that means the fun must stop. Some days I am totally cool with leaving. But on this day in particular, I felt like reaching into my Hell Cat days and giving the old bird a run for her money. I fooled her though by being well behaved on our walk back from school. But as soon as we got in the door, I let loose!
I refused to wash my hands by running away and hiding under the pillows on the couch. Oh yes, Mother Dear, I HEAR you, but I ain't listenin'!! Finally, after much struggle and a drenched shirt, my hands were clean. And then she starts up again asking me to sit for my lunch. Eh, maybe for a minute, but I have other things to do, like bother my new baby sister in her swing. I like to see her eyes bug out when I really get it going high! And there goes Mother again saying something about 'not breaking' something and 'being careful'...
Well, I must have met my limit because now here I am in the brown chair, strapped in like some prisoner. I'll show her. Won't eat...not one bite! Oh the tears I can pull out when I get angry at my mother. Okay, maybe just a few bites.
Upstairs we go to get ready for my siesta. Q likes to poop in a million diapers within ten minutes, so Mother was busy changing her when...oh no...my tummy, it hurts...something isn't right. Mother disappears with Q momentarily and then the next thing I know, I am being scooped up and transported at lightening speed towards the bathroom. But much to my mother's avail, the mango yogurt, carrots, and milk I decided to scarf down in record time went all over the upstairs hallway carpet, wall, some random toys (poor innocent victims!) my mother and me. By the time we made it to the potty, I was spent. It was all over my hands and clothes. I began to wail because no one likes being covered in puke! We stood in the tub to wash off and I vaguely remember her saying something like, 'Stay put!' as she vanished.
Q was screaming herself. Mother transported her from her bed to the swing in hopes of calming her. This didn't work right away. Eventually, when Q figured no one was coming, she did what she does best and just fell asleep.
I decided to follow anyway and stepped in all kinds of puddles on the floor when Round 2 began. I felt like Super Woman on the way to the toilet, but once again I got everything on the floor and wall and nothing in the potty. Mother was not pleased. After she washed me off AGAIN, she put me in my room with the gate on my door. I wasn't able to calm down because my tummy still hurt. However, this time it wanted to come out a different way. (It's important to note that at this time, I wasn't being very cooperative in the pooping department and still demanded a diaper). I stood at my door and screamed and screamed. By this time, Mother had a few loud words herself and shut the door to ignore my protests. When it opened again, I was able to find super strength and ripped the gate from my door declaring that I had to poop and throw up again! Mother came over with a look of desperation only to find that I did indeed leave a little "chocolate" present for her on the floor. I decided to dip my heal in it as she whisked me again to the bathroom, where I stepped in puke again (why it wasn't cleaned up already, I have no idea...)
At that point, I thought Mother was going to collapse. Her eyes bulged from her head, her face turned a bright red color, and perhaps a little dribble from her mouth started towards her chin. I demanded to be left at the potty because I had to puke, I was certain of it. In an act of surrender, she left the bathroom to start cleaning up all the deposits on the hallway carpet.
That was when it happened...something descended in my body. At my own choosing, I figured the Elmo potty was there, why not just use it. Afterwards, my tummy felt AMAZING!! It was like a weight lifted off of me, or more so, out of me. I was so excited, I forgot all about puking and exclaimed, "Mommy!! I pooped in the potty!! Can I get some ice cream now?"
When Mother turned around, the look of exhaustion disappeared and one of sheer pride overcame her! We embraced and cheered! And just like that, I was back to my well behaved self and decided it was time to take a rest. I think Mother took one too."
